Giltron's Mixings

the mixing of exotic cocktails

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  • Send in the Clowns!

    BG Reynolds makes wonderful syrups that make delicious cocktails. While perusing their site,I found this:

    I was immediately intrigued. Especially after looking through their recipes section and finding this:

    I mean,who wouldn’t want to try a drink with that name? And thus,my love of ‘clown syrup’ began. Here’s the drinks from BGR’s website that I’ve enjoyed. I think you will too.

    Mix #6 Fear of a Clown Planet

    2oz dark rum
    1oz orange juice
    1oz pineapple juice
    1/2oz lime juice
    3/4oz Circus Peanut syrup

    An excellent mix of sweet and sour in the same way as a properly made Mai Tai. If your friends think they’re too cool to try a drink made with circus peanut flavoring,have them give this a try. They’ll honk their approval.

    Mix #7 Clown Barf

    2oz gold rum
    3/4oz grapefruit juice
    3/4oz lemon juice
    1/2oz fassionola
    1/2oz Circus Peanut syrup
    2 dashes Angostura bitters
    6 drops absinthe

    A sweet drink,snobs will call it “touristy”,but I would serve it at a barbeque. Also goes well with pizza.

    Mix #8 Blair’s Mistake

    1oz light rum
    1oz gin
    1oz lime juice
    3/4oz honey mix
    3/4oz Circus Peanut syrup
    1/2oz pineapple juice
    dash Angostura bitters
    soda water to fill
    1oz overproof rum float*

    (*I recommend Lemon Hart 151 as it floats well. And is delicious. Oh,and kinda strong.)

    The mistake Blair made was to have more than one of these. They’re really good,but the sweet syrups with three ounces(one overproof) of liquor are a recipe for a serious hangover if you’re not careful.

    Mix #9 Djumbo Grog

    1oz overproof rum
    1oz dark rum
    1oz light rum
    1.5oz grapefruit juice
    1oz Circus Peanut syrup
    3/4oz lime juice
    1/2oz cinnamon syrup
    1/2oz falernum
    2 dashes Angostura bitters

    Rumor has it that this drink was invented by PT Barnum. After hearing about Don the Beachcomber’s Zombie,had said to one of his clowns,“hold my cotton candy”,and proceeded to come up with this potent concoction. It’s got all the kick of a proper Zombie,but goes down easier. An appropriate drink for watching the upcoming political debates.

    So break out your silly nose and enjoy!

  • The Other Mai Tais

    While there is only one true recipe for the original Mai Tai,that’s not to say there can’t be variations. The Trader himself had his own alternative Mai Tais. The Honi Honi was his bourbon Mai Tai,which just subbed bourbon for rum. I used Makers Mark to make these for a friend at our Xmas party who didn’t like rum. He loved it.

    Mix #2 the Honi Honi

    2oz bourbon
    1oz lime juice
    1/2oz orange curacao
    1/2oz orgeat
    1/4oz simple syrup

    Trader Vic’s also has alternate Mai Tais at their locations which use juices such as passion fruit,mango,and guava. Here’s their Guava Tai from one of the e-mails they’ve sent me:

    Mix #3 TV’s Guava Tai

    1oz gold rum
    1oz light rum
    3/4oz Trader Vic’s Mai Tai Concentrate(not mix)
    1oz guava juice
    1/2oz lime juice.

    I’ve even created my own two variations. The first was a happy accident. I decided to make a high octane Mai Tai by using Hamilton’s Beachbum Berry’s Zombie Blend,a nice ‘little 118 proof’ rum. Zombies usually take 4oz of rum,so I used 2oz in my Mai Tai. After feeling the effects of this,I decided to actually read the label on the bottle,and found out that only 2oz was intended to be used to make their version of the Zombie. Oops. Oh well,I can work with this. I swapped the orange curacao for blue,and it gave the drink a cool ‘zombie’ coloring. Since this upgunned Mai Tai can sink you,I named it the Davy Jones Mai Tai.

    Mix #4 Davy Jones Mai Tai

    2oz Hamilton Beachbum Berry’s Zombie Blend
    1oz lime juice
    1/2oz blue curacao
    1/2oz orgeat
    1/4oz simple syrup

    The second was intended to make a funky Mai Tai. I love Demerara rum,and used this as the base with other ingredients intended to bring the funk. I submitted this to BG Reynolds’ website and was told they would post it. In the meantime,here it is for your enjoyment.

    Mix #5 Funk #44

    2oz Lemon Hart & Sons 1804
    1oz lime juice
    1/2oz Solerno blood orange
    1/2oz orgeat
    1/4oz BG Reynolds Demerara syrup

    Enjoy!

  • Mix #1 the Mai Tai ‘44

    In 1944,Trader Vic invented the Mai Tai to showcase a 17-year-old rum imported by J. Wray & Nephew. Upon tasting the wonderful elixir,one of his friends from Tahiti said,“maita’i roa ae!”,which loosely translates to “out of this world,the best!”,and the Mai Tai was born. The Mai Tai is,in my not-so-humble opinion,the greatest of all tiki drinks. A proper Mai Tai should balance the sweet and sour so that you don’t taste any one specific ingredient. There have been many versions of the Mai Tai over the years,some delicious,some a tragic waste of rum. The correct recipe,as shown in my Trader Vic’s glass above,is as follows:

    Mai Tai ’44

    2oz dark rum*
    1oz lime juice
    ½ oz orange curacao
    ½ oz orgeat
    ¼ oz simple syrup

    Shake all ingredients with ice and serve unstrained in a double rocks glass.

    *Some recipes use one ounce each of dark and gold rum.

    My current preferred recipe is:

    2oz English Harbor
    1oz cold pressed lime juice
    ½ oz Pierre Ferrand dry curacao
    ½ oz Small Hand Foods orgeat
    ¼ oz Stirrings simple syrup

    Previously I’ve enjoyed using Appleton Estate’s Signature,8,and 12yr and Diplomatico Reserva Exclusiva. I prefer ‘funkier’ rums in my Mai Tais.

    Mai Tais should never contain orange juice,or be blended. Triple sec is not a proper substitute for curacao. There are many recipes that play with the proportions of the ingredients,but trust me,the original recipe works the best. If you want to add some zip to your Mai Tai,you can do a float of 151 Demerara rum on top. At the original Trader Vic’s in San Fran this was called the “Old Way” because an older man who was a regular liked his like this.

  • Aloha!

    Aloha everyone! I am Giltron,Grand Poobah of the DC chapter of the Order of the Golden Fez. I’m retired military,currently a bicycle mechanic(specializing in Bromptons) living in Washington DC. I’ve always been into exotica and surf rock,but the fun that was 2020 got me seriously into all things tiki. Now I’m running out of places to display my mugs,and I hang out every Thursday at the House of Foong Lin in Bethesda,MD wearing ugly shirts and a silly hat.

    My friends are doing centuries of tiki bars,but lacking the funds and time,I’ve decided to do a century+ of tiki drink mixings. I’m currently at 97 recipes and have even been published in Exotica Moderne #17. I’ve finally gotten around to creating a blog to document my mixing and act as a resource for folks to find delicious recipes. So put on some Tikiyaki Orchestra, don your fez,and have a Mai Tai. Aloha!