Freaky clown lovin’.

Hauʻoli makahiki hou! Your Uncle Giltron is back for another year of fun and frivolity. Now,some of the more jaded of you might think this post has some veiled political message(something about the state of politics in the USA),but I can assure you it is a hundred precent pure Tiki. You see,BG Reynolds has brought back their Clown Sirop! They take orders,and when they reach a certain number,they produce a batch. And your Uncle Giltron just can’t get enough of this magic elixir. Most of the following recipes were created by mixing genius Jason Alexander(the bartender,not the actor),who’s so good at mixing that he can create a winner by putting together ingredients in his head without even tasting them. So without further ado,let’s start clowning around. Enjoy!

Mix #255 Barnum & Bailey’s Planter’s Punch

1.5oz aged Jamaican rum
1/2oz overproof rum
1oz lemon juice
3/4oz circus peanut syrup
1/4oz Don’s spices #2*

Shake with ice and pour into tall glass while whistling “Entry of the Gladiators”.

*Don’s Spices #2 = 1:1 vanilla syrup and pimento dram

A complex drink,sweet with a bit of spice,you can taste all ingredients. The overproof gives it kick. Very nice.

Mix #256 Big Top Mai Tai

2.5oz Plantation Xaymaca rum
1.5oz lemon juice
1oz circus peanut syrup
1/2oz passionfruit syrup
1/2oz orgeat

Shake with ice and pour into Mai Tai glass.

Very sweet and fruity,almost touristy,but still a proper Tiki drink. Two and a half ounces of rum give it decent kick. If you like sweet you’ll love this.

Mix #257 Clown Sling

2oz gin
1oz lemon juice
1oz circus peanut syrup
1/4oz cherry heering
1/4oz allspice dram
4 dashes Angostura bitters
2oz seltzer

Shake everything except seltzer with ice and pour into glass. Top with seltzer.

A Singapore Sling riff,this is sweet with the gin coming forward. Sling and Saturn fans will love this.

Mix #258 Clown’s Own Punch

1.5oz dark Jamaican rum
1oz light rum
1oz lemon juice
1oz circus peanut syrup
1oz soda water

Shake with ice and pour into a pilsner glass.

This is rum forward with a clown aftertaste. You’ll want to use good rum for this since you’ll really be able to taste it. An excellent drink for someone who doesn’t think they’d like clown sirop.

Mix #259 Not my Circus, Not My Monkey’s

1oz Plantation OFTD rum
3/4oz Plantation Xaymaca rum
3/4oz Plantation Original Dark rum
1.5oz lime juice
1oz circus peanut syrup
3/4oz Don’s Mix*
1/4oz Luxardo Maraschino liqueur
1tsp Don’s Zombie Mix**
2 dashes Angostura bitters

*Don’s Mix = 2:1 white grapefruit juice to cinnamon syrup
**Don’s Zombie Mix = equal parts grenadine/falernum/absinthe/dry curacao

Our final Jason Alexander drink is a very complex one;there’s all sorts of flavors running around in here. Sweet,citrus,cinnamon,the bite of Luxardo,and a touch of absinthe. It’s got some kick too. A serious Tiki drink to showcase a silly sirop.

Mix #260 Chimp Cocktail

2oz Ultimate Mai Tai blend* or blended Navy rum
1oz lime juice
1/2oz circus peanut syrup
1/2oz banana liqueur

Shake with ice and pour into Mai Tai glass.

*UMT blend is 1/2oz each of Appleton 12yr,Smith & Cross,Plantation Xaymaca,and OFTD.

From Kevin Crossman comes a Mai Tai riff with a nice sweet/tart blend. Like Clown Punch,you can really taste the rum. I used the UMT blend,but Hamilton Navy Grog Blend or Plantation Mister Fogg would both work well. Has a good kick either way. A tasty riff on a classic.

Mix #261 Hurriclown

1.5oz dark Jamaican rum
1/2oz overproof Demerara rum
1oz lemon juice
3/4oz circus peanut syrup
1/3oz(10ml) passionfruit syrup

Shake with ice and pour into Mai Tai glass.

Another Crossman recipe,this may be my new favorite clown drink. It has a nice sweet/citrus balance with some funk from the rum. I used Appleton 12yr for the dark,but both Plantation OFTD and Lemon Hart 151 are good for the overproof,depending on whether you want this to be high octane or jet fuel. This is going in my regular roster.

Mix #262 A Clown Got Us Into This

1.5oz light rum
1/2oz overproof Jamaican rum
1.5oz lime juice
1/2oz banana liqueur
3/4oz circus peanut syrup
1/8oz grenadine
2 dashes orange bitters

Shake with ice and pour into Mai Tai glass.

From Rodney Stanton of the South SF Bay Ohana online meetup,this has rum on nose and is sweet with a grenadine and clown finish. The lime keeps it from being too sweet,so it’s a nice balanced drink.

So sit back,have a cocktail,and watch the clowns. Booyakasha!